May 30th, 2004

(no subject)

today dennis and i drove two hours there and back to a fair that wasn't today. work called and gave up on my vacation, told me to go back on call cause they were sick of things breaking. so i'm back on call and stuck to 60 minutes from work maximum without notice, again. and i can't drink anything more than whatever is legal to drive with again. being on call is fantastic.

cait should be er, well she's probably driving through dover right about now, i imagine. 30 minutes either way from here at least.

what elsh... kat gave me a good idea the night. she said "dont go to each restaurant, just sit at home with the yellow pages and call them to see if they have positions even available, and then apply to just those". that kid's got a brain in her afterall :D


saw shrek 2 tonight. dammit. dammit dammit dammit. i got stuck with a 1/6 scottish brogue all night long. just enough to round the edges arf the wards thar. annoying as all hell.

OH! and, today before the movie we ate at this sandwich place that does stir fry and it's awesome. they have free wifi, and when we went up the counter to ask how their peculiar ordering system works, the first girl goes "well first off you just pick whichever of us you think is cuter, and ask her to take your order". and then the second one started flirting with me. ^///^ and then i realized i was being a letch cause they were probably like 18, so i scurried off ^^;

and i read a book in a store called "the science of the X-Men", and they talked about how each mutant's powers could actually be real. i wanted to buy it because it was interesting, but i've been spending enough money. i already blew my entire tax return, which wasn't even my money. got that stupid ps2 with it. and now i want a gameboy, cause dennis showed me that they have those in color these days. *sigh* so out of the times. i couldnt even beat the best scores on his mariokart game for his gameboy.

anyways, the stir fry i bought for lunch came with a fork, and a pair of chopsticks. was i being a pretentious, pompous white boy twit by using them? i decided "yes" and then i decided "who cares just use them" and i used them. :D maybe the girl was flirting with me because i was wearing my elephant safari hunter shirt and looked like a kung fu master with fists of fury and an immortal hunger of dispair?


last night i hopped into bed around midnight or so, and i had just had a bowl of ice cream previously so i was assuming it would be a long wait to fall asleep.

every now and then, though, my brain will slip into this interesting crevice between consciousness and sub-consciousness, like it's hyper-aware. I know that it's just some figment of my imagination, but whenever I'm zoned into this, the visuals are just endlessly amusing.

Typically, my mind will wander for a while but I'll feel it drifting towards a "center lock". Literally last night, I felt as though I were searching for wherever the center of my brain was. As I drifted towards it, I felt overwhelmed by the sensation of complete lucidity, and it seemed as though all of my peripheral senses were muted by this new sensation of clarity. Then come the shapes.

The shapes are the part I find endlessly amusing. Visually I will see a blackness, a pure blackness, imagined through any ambient light seeping in through my eyes, so it seems that I'm at least partially sub-conscious by this point. Then some sort of geometrical primal will appear, like a cube or a sphere. They'll begin to rotate, and then they'll change. They'll spit out new arms and legs and invert themselves, and then multiply, and then they will integrate into each other and it's just a complete visual acid trip. It's really fantastic, and I've awoken myself laughing at some of the stupid things they make. I remember a dog last night, it had started out as an angry dog, and someone picked it up and dropped it on the ground, and it made a squeaking noise as it turned inside out, bouncing on the sidewalk, until it regained its shape, inside out, which was a happy dog with its tounge hanging out.

The first thing that happened last night, though, was that I was apparently deliberately searching for the center of my brain, and then in the blackness formed a little blue 3D brain. It started rotating, and then started to branch out with all these creepy lobe like things that obviously wouldnt fit inside of a skull. So there was this GIANT lobe sticking out the side of my brain, and I asked "whats that lobe for?" and this voice goes "self distraction". And I said "ughhh" cause I thought that was pretty significant. Anyways, that creeped me the hell out, and I figured there was no chance I'd remember that. Yet lo and behold, I did. Hrm.