November 16th, 2006

(no subject)

Kicked back with a bottle of Bud
kept it real
that's my thing, you know
I keep it real

Damned Pats. Lost that game the other night.

So I was out in the giant back yard I have, grilling hot dogs while washing the new truck (almost got the Escapade, but I was able to "envision" myself driving bricks home from the yard. My boss Tony told me I could keep any that cracked, and it was 4 hours later I found myself elbow-deep in broken bits.

So I'm tossing these brick chips out from the bed while giving it a good once-over with the hose, and I find this dead mouse. Funny thing is though, that it's only got one eyeball. And for the life of me, I can't figure out what musta happened to it. All I know is that it's creeping me out cause now I figure there's a mouse eyeball stuck in some crevice somewhere, spying on me.

Anyways, so I finish the dogs off, yeah, I burned them on the bottom. Big whoop, wanna fight about it? (Family Guy quote, little show I like to call "awesome to the maxcore"). And the dog, he got left outside cause I sprayed him down with the hose. Stupid mutt, he just stands there trying to chew the water.

So here I am, doing my thing, you know -- keeping it real with my Bud (ok you caught me, it was a Bud Light, don't tell the guys), and so I gotta let the stupid dog back inside. So I go let him in, and the numbnuts hops right over and plops down in front of the fire and passes out. I'm walking on the way back to the couch, and I step on something sharp and hurt my foot! Dammit dog, what did you bring in this time?

So I crouch down and pick it up -- and drop it the hell back down -- the dog brought the head of the mouse inside! And now the OTHER eye is missing! So now I got a missing mouse eye spying on me in my house, and another in my truck... it's a good thing I was born so macho, that it barely even phases me. I have nerves of adamantium. That's a little X-Men joke, see, my nerves are stronger than steel. They would cut steel in half, they're so awesome. Anyways, that's me.

Keeping it real.